Company Family Day will be held this weekend in here and as hubby had clearly say that he will not come due to his job demand, I dare my self to take the boys all by my self. No, that’s a lie. I will bring the nannies with me. But still, without hubby, I feel so alone and vulnerable as I will be the one who is in charge. Nah, I just made a hyperbolic comment. I believe I can manage but to be totally honest, yes - this will be the first time I take both boys without their father for more than 4 hours and usually only over a trip to the Mall. I know that it’s pathetic. 

Anyway, being an incompetent & seldom around Mom, I feel very nervous. They are so attached to their daddy, especially the little one. What if he cried all night and ask for his daddy? I can’t ask hubby to come in the middle of the night drive 2 - 3 hours to Anyer, can I? Hubby would kill me. I can’t ask somebody else to pretend to be his father either because Pascal would recognize him right away. By the way, this is the tactic that my Mom used when hubby and I went taking Mika to Singapore several months a go. Mom had my youngest brother slept with Pascal so when Pascal awake, he saw a man figure next to him and he thought it’s his daddy. Har har. I can’t ask for the same thing, can I? Hubby would kill me. To mitigate this risk, I had started pre-conditioning Pascal that daddy will not come. And he stubbornly said, “He will come!”. I told him that daddy will take us to the big Barney bus and we will go with the bus to the beach. Daddy will pick us again in Jakarta. There will be a lot of friends there and he can swim to his heart content. He can even make sand castle and got present. After a quite about 5 minutes of lengthy explanation and luring, Pascal said again, “Daddy will come!”. Oh no. So I give up for the time being. I guess Pascal is still in denial.

Anyway, I had started packing last night. Whilst selecting things to be placed inside the luggage which is varied from pots & pants, small stove, water heater, milk bottles, nipples and cans of milk, kecap cap bango, swim suit, I felt another jolt of panic attack. What if there’s tsunami? A colleague of mine sent us an article that there will be high wave in that area and both Mika and Pascal still can’t swim properly. I am not sure about the nannies. I am contemplating to have them wearing life jacket wherever they go for this coming 2 days. I am sure they will be pleased.

Pascal has started coughing as well. So I guess I will need to bring his usual medicines and some warm oil for emergency. I hope he will not have fever. Other than that, the hat provided by the Company is not sufficient to cover their necks. So I guess I will bring the other company’s hat that will protect the back of their necks from sun burn.

What about the toys? Mika wanted to bring the whole collection of Ben 10 and Justice League. Pascal is having difficulties in selecting which train and/or monster truck to bring. I need to constantly remind the nanny that we will be using the company’s bus and please please please select only the must have and not the good to have it around for just in case. But even the selection process has caused some tension and constant badgering between the two boys. And NO, YOU CAN NOT BRING YOUR BICYLCLES!

I think my biggest fear is when they started fighting or being their boisterous selves and there is no daddy to discipline them this time. There were times (more than I could remember) when my warning was completely ignored until hubby came and took control, and then they stop and listened. Oh gosh…what a challenge! I feel completely useless.

Anyway, all is packed and I am ready to take my two dare devils with me. We’ll be back with the complete story next week. Wish me luck!