Below is our typical morning conversation when hubby drives me to the Office:

Conversation 1. 

This conversation takes place somewhere in Radio Dalam:

Me: I like my hair, M. Do you like my hair? (whilst busy with Angelina)

Hubby: Yeah (eyes to the road)

Me: I really like it. I think I will highlight it again exactly like this. With three colours. Blonde, burgundy and brown. I like these streaks of blonde hair. What do you think?

Hubby: Yeah (eyes to the road)

Me: But it will be quite costly though…

Hubby: Yeah (eyes to the road)

End of conversation 1. I got the ’approval’ to re-highlight my hair. I was busied with Angelina again.

This conversation takes place somewhere in Barito: 

Conversation 2.

Me: Can I have a cat?

Hubby: No (eyes a bit diverted from the street watching the caged animal in Barito Street)

Me: Why?

Hubby: It’s smelly.

Me: Cat doesn’t smell. And we will bath him/her.

Hubby: Who will look after them?

Me: Me.

Hubby: When will you have the time? Will you take them to the Office?

End of conversation 2.

What a bummer.

One of my colleague who once saw (read: peep) my e-mail to hubby ask me why did I initial it with J and not S and why hubby initial his with M and not Y.

Well, J is my nick name at home.

Iit started when hubby and I got engaged in 22 Dec 1997 (is this the correct day, M? I believe so). I don’t remember exactly how it started but I think on that day, after the long and tiring Minang engagement ceremony where the elders from both families citing poem to each other in Padangese for almost an hour (which I didn’t know any word they said, they could have traded me for a cow - I wouldn’t know), I sat on his lap in my pink kebaya and hubby (or fiance at that time) called me je t’aime. I love you. I think it kinda sweet and I like it. So it stucked until today but now, it is pronounced Jetun. Just like the paint. And the short form of it is Jet. So just in case you happened to be in my house and heard hubby called “Jet!” it does not mean that we have Jet Lee as our new body guard. He simply called me.

M is hubby’s nick name at home.

No, it has nothing to do with James Bond’s boss, the famous M. I used to call my hubby with just his name even after we got married. Some wives do call their husband with Mas (Javanese) and Uda (Padangese) once they got serious. Meaning: big brother. Since I literally grew up with hubby, I do not see any need in changing the way we address each other. He was one of my best friend who became my high school sweetheart then husband. Why on earth should I suddenly call him big brother all of a sudden?

Anyway, in the beginning of our marriage, it is a tradition in hubby’s family that we should pay visit to the elders. In visiting them, we should wear traditional dress and bring cake whereas they would serve us lunch or dinner.

Being a completely independent woman for the past 25 years, I used to walk in alone with the cake in my kebaya whilst hubby parked the car. I simply don’t like waiting under the sun. It will make me sweat, ruin my make up and flare my Lupus (what a robust excuse!). So I’d prefer to walk in like some lone ranger. Some of hubby’s relative would welcome and asked me, “Mana Uda?” or where is your big brother. And I looked back in wonder and answered, “I don’t bring my brother.” and they looked back at me as if I showed up wearing pink wig and polka dots shoes (although that wouldn’t be a bad idea compared to kebaya and painful korset and sanggul). it took me a while to realise that they were referring to my newly wedded husband. Ach so! Why don’t they just said so?

But that didn’t change they way I called hubby. Until few months later hubby told me that his Mom told him to tell me that I should change the way I communicate with hubby. Huh? Well, first of all, my Mother in Law is the sweetest woman on earth. Really. If she said something like that, it means that it had caused quite a concern in the family. Oh well. We’d better think of something before we offend anyone since we will be stucked with them for the rest of our lives. I didn’t feel like calling him Uda. I didn’t feel like calling him Mas. So I short it to M. M. Everybody is happy and we are happy.

So, that’s the story of M & J. As we passed through the years of marriage, these names sticked. I almost never call hubby with his real name and neither does he. We never call each other with Papa or Mama as well as he is not my father and I am not his mother. We found this convenient enough until our kids started to call me ‘Jet’ and called hubby ‘M’. O-oh…looks like finally we have to grow up and call each other with something else.

But meanwhile, I like being called J. And I would rather remind Mika to call us with our proper standard title.

If I imagined my life as a series of movie episodes, I wish that I could skip some moment in my life to jump to the next episode.

Wouldn’t it be great, if you can fast forward to the part of life that you’ve been wanting to experience and skip the one that you are not so eager to experience? Wouldn’t it be great if you can rewind a part of your life so you can undo things that you did wrong? Or experiencing the oh-so-good part twice or more and perfecting it? And when you are in that oh-so-perfect moment, wouldn’t it be great if you can pause it? Freeze in time and hoping that time would stand still for you and every moment you have will be the greatest moment of all?

And when you are in doubt, wouldn’t it be great if you could see the end of it? Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could have a sneak peek and see what kind of surprise that is waiting for you around the corner? Wouldn’t it be awesome if you could have some spoiler in advance so you knew what to expect? If you could have the making of your life and been given a chance to understand the reason why things happened for the way they are? Why this thing happened to you at this episode and not before? So many whys will be answered.

How I wish it could be true. But probably then I will not treasure it as much as I do now and life will not be as intriguing as well as wonderfully excruciating as it is now.