Having worked in multi national environment for the past 9 years has made me use to stereotypes. American adored freedom of thinking, British are adventurous, Dutch are humanist (by letting gay get married and legalized pots), Singaporean are hard worker and Indonesian are friendly people. These are positive stereotypes. On the other hand, there are also a set of negative stereotypes such as American are loud mouthed, British are rigid, Dutch are cheap, Singaporean are rude and Indonesian are corrupt. This list of negative stereotypes can go on and on and on.

However, being a dedicated human behavior observer I noted that beneath the surface, human actually are the same everywhere. I’ve met Indonesian who are loud mouthed (especially those who came from Northern Sumatra or East Java) and I’ve met American who are gentle and softly spoken. I’ve met a very polite Singaporean and I’ve met a very generous Dutchman. These are okay and in general people understood it. Stereotype is generated so people could have a vague idea towards a complete new subject. However, one should not make judgment nor decision based on stereotype. Why? Because every human is a unique individual and everybody is different, just like everybody else.

I think what irritated me most is when people started generalizing or judging others based on stereotype. And this is not only towards my fellow expatriate but also to my fellow Indonesian. I used to hear that expatriates are greedy and selfish. Indonesia is not their motherland and therefore this foreign management is trying to take whatever then can. And who let them do that? Hello??? I am aware that some foreign management maybe deliberately do that but to say (let say) that these American is so greedy, they can’t never get enough I think shows the speaker ignorance. Because the truth is, I knew some American who genuinely trying to help us with no string attached. From one human to another. Regardless the fact that one skin is brown and the other is white.

On the other hand, I also got the impression from some of the expatriates that in general Indonesian has no respects towards time, indiscipline and tend not to tell the truth. Hmmm…all I could say that I’ve seen people trying to take things that they are not suppose to take, made false reason not to go to the office and believe me, they were not limited to skin color or nationality or the balance of your check book. It is done by the rich, by the poor and by the middle class. Human behavior is human behavior. Power tends to corrupt. And therefore a balance between control and empowerment is very important. It is another ignorance to say because you are poor(er) therefore you are entitled to take more. Believe me, rich and poor are also very subjective word. Enough is a very subjective word. Enough about grammar!!

Culture is another thing. Many stereotypes made based on culture generalization. And for this, below is the quote that I think represent the difference between East and West:

Westerner are children of Plato, they are always seeking for the truth
Easterner are children of Confusius, they are always seeking to live in harmony

In another word, being a Westerner, you won’t be shy to present the truth. You would argue fierce fully for something that you believe is right even though that would mean that you are going to ruffle some feathers. The truth is so important because the truth provides clarity. Is that so? In majority, maybe yes. But reading the newspaper headlines about the debate within the Bush Government has really made me questioned the real meaning quote. What will happen if this is happen in Indonesia or is Politicians are the same everywhere? This is another generalization.

On the other hand, Easterner is very conscious in maintaining harmony by making consensus decision. Making a group decision rather than individual decisions tends to be more favored for the sake of harmony. My late Father has a very delicate phrase. He used to say, “It is not what you say but it is how you say it. It is how you pull out a hair through flour. You should be able to do it without leaving a mark behind.” That’s his famous advise, usually after I argue fierce fully towards the eldest. Being a city girl for my entire life, I snorted at this advise. However, now that I am a grown up and therefore society demands me to ‘behave better’, I appreciate and treasured his advise even more.

Therefore, to my frustrated fellow expatriate I used to say that their Indonesian staff did not mean to hide something from them or not telling them truth. And silence does not mean agreement. And that they should appreciate the difficulties for their Indonesian colleague to say directly that your plan sucks (let alone saying it in English) as they don’t want to hurt your feeling. On the other hand I used to encourage my fellow Indonesian to be more direct and open with their western colleagues. It is not a matter of being impolite, although you still should put it nicely, but it is a matter of being clear and speak your concern if you have any. They will appreciate it.

My point is, stereotyping is good as beginning. It gives you a point to start a communication with other people. However, negative stereotype is bad. As it will hinder you from other people good quality.